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Who Are You Without the Struggle?

October 6, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

In the healing journey, a strange thing can happen:

You felt better.

You sleep through the night. You go a whole week without a flare-up. You laugh. You rest. You notice silence where there used to be pain.

And then—almost immediately—you tense.

A quiet voice says: “Don’t get your hopes up.” “This probably won’t last.” “Who am I if I’m not working on getting better?”

That’s when you realize the struggle itself has become part of your identity. And now, healing asks you to do something even scarier than trying harder.

It asks you to let go of the struggle. To live as a person who no longer needs to fight. To change your identity.

Healing as a Full-Time Job

When you’ve been in the world of chronic illness, burnout, anxiety, or trauma recovery, your healing work often becomes all-consuming.

You learn to track every symptom and manage your schedule around your energy. You study protocols, track labs, stack supplements. You surround yourself with communities where “the struggle” is the dominant language.

None of this is wrong. In fact, much of it is necessary—especially when the medical system hasn’t helped or believed you.

But after a while, it’s easy to mistake healing work for who you are.

It becomes your focus, your identity, your story.

When the Body Is Ready—But the Mind Isn’t

Here’s something I’ve seen repeatedly:

A person’s body begins to heal. The inflammation decreases, and the gut improves. The nervous system stabilizes. Energy returns.

But the mind doesn’t know how to live without the struggle.

It waits for the other shoe to drop, expecting a relapse. It keeps scanning for danger—even if the danger is gone.

This isn’t sabotage. It’s survival.

For months, years, or decades, your nervous system has been in hypervigilance. You have tied your identity to “I’m the one who’s still healing.”

Letting go of that struggle means facing a new unknown: Who am I when I’m no longer defined by this?

Struggle Gives a Sense of Control—Even When It Hurts

The struggle can feel strangely safe.

It gives structure. (Something to work on, something to fix.)

It provides identity. (You’re the strong one. The determined one. The sensitive one.)

It connects you to a community. (People who “get it.”)

It fills time and space. (Without it, what would you do—or feel?)

So when the struggle lifts, a strange grief can emerge. It can feel like losing something familiar—even if it was painful.

This is normal. And it’s okay to feel it.

But don’t confuse grief with failure. This is not a sign that something is wrong. It’s a sign that a new story is trying to be born.

Beyond the Struggle: A New Way of Being

You don’t have to go back to the person you were before. You don’t have to become someone entirely new, either.

You are allowed to become someone who carries the wisdom of the struggle—but no longer needs it to define them.

Someone who says:

“I used to live in survival mode. Now I choose peace.”

“I don’t need to be sick to justify slowing down.”

“I can trust joy, even if I’m still learning how.”

Healing becomes less about effort—and more about allowing.

You stop performing your progress and collecting symptoms like proof. You stop waiting for permission to feel good.

And instead… you live. You rest. You create. You connect. You begin again.

Three Practices to Explore Who You Are Without the Struggle

1. Make Room for “What Now?” Instead of “What’s Wrong?”

Your mind may be trained to look for the next problem. That’s okay. You can gently ask:

“If nothing is wrong in this moment, what would I want to feel or do?”

This practice shifts your attention from symptom-scanning to soul-listening. For many people, this is very challenging. But the benefits are immense. 

2. Reclaim Desire—Not Just Duty

Many people only allow themselves to rest or play after doing enough healing work. But what if pleasure, art, connection, and joy were part of healing—not the reward for it?

Ask yourself:

What do I want to create that has nothing to do with fixing myself?

What kind of life am I building now that my energy is coming back?

What used to light me up that I’ve set aside?

Let your life be about more than maintenance.

3. Create a New Self-Story

Take 10 minutes and journal from this prompt:

“I am no longer someone who struggles all the time. I am now someone who…”

Let the words flow. Don’t edit or censor. Just see what emerges.

This is where the new story begins.

You Don’t Have to Struggle to Deserve Healing

You don’t have to earn your peace or prove yourself. You don’t have to struggle to be worthy of rest, ease, or health.

You are allowed to live beyond the fight. To move through life without waiting for the next shoe to drop. To soften, expand, and trust—even if only in small moments.

That’s what real healing is.

Not the absence of symptoms. But the presence of freedom.

Next up: “The New Story: How to Begin Again.”

Our last post in this series will guide you in consciously creating a new health story—one built on trust, presence, and possibility.

Until then, let this question echo:

Who am I when I no longer need the struggle to know myself?

And what would it feel like… to live the answer?

P.S. In the Letting Go of the Story workshop, we’ll walk this exact path—through reflection, embodied practice, and new story creation. It’s your time. Join the interest list here 

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Letting Go of the Diagnosis: Healing Beyond Labels

September 29, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

For many people, finally getting a diagnosis feels like a turning point. It can explain our symptoms.

It can be a huge relief:

  • At last, there’s an explanation.
  • At last, there’s a name for what you’ve been living with.
  • At last, some proof that you’re not “making it up.”

And yet, I’ve also seen how that same diagnosis can quietly turn into a kind of cage.

What starts as “Now I know what I’m working with” sometimes becomes:

  • “I am hypothyroid.”
  • “I’m a Lyme patient.”
  • “I’m bipolar.”
  • “I’m ADHD.”

The label that once felt freeing becomes an identity. And when that happens, healing often slows down—or even stalls—without us realizing why.

The Double-Edged Sword of Diagnosis

To be clear: diagnosis itself isn’t the enemy.

It can be life-changing. It can guide treatment, open doors to resources, and validate years of confusing symptoms.

But a diagnosis is just a snapshot. It’s a way of naming patterns, labs, and symptoms in this moment. It’s not a prophecy. It’s not your personality. And it’s definitely not your destiny.

The trouble begins when the story shifts from:

  • “I’m experiencing this” → “I am this.”

That subtle shift changes the way you relate to your body, the choices you make each day, and even what your nervous system expects for your future.

The Invisible Subtitles

Every diagnosis carries a hidden story. Sometimes it’s said outright:

  • “There’s no cure.”
  • “It only gets worse.”
  • “You’ll just have to manage it.”

Other times, you simply absorb it—through tone, statistics, or the way people stop expecting recovery.

Your brain and body are always listening. Even if no one says it directly, the nervous system gets the message. And once that seed is planted, it influences biology:

  • You brace for flare-ups.
  • You stop exploring new approaches.
  • You begin to expect decline.

This isn’t weakness. It’s human nature—our brains prefer predictability, even if it limits possibility. But healing rarely flourishes in the soil of hopelessness.

You Are Not Your Diagnosis

One of the most powerful shifts you can make is separating who you are from what you’re experiencing.

Instead of saying:

  • “I’m a chronic fatigue patient.”
    Try: “I’ve been navigating fatigue, and I’m learning what my body needs.”

Instead of:

  • “I’m a depressed person.”
    Try: “I’ve been experiencing depression symptoms, and I’m supporting my brain and body as they rebalance.”

Language isn’t just semantics—it changes biology. Research shows that people who see themselves as active participants in their health, rather than passive victims, have stronger immune function, more symptom improvement, and greater resilience.

This isn’t “toxic positivity.” It’s neuroscience.

What Story Are You Living?

If you’ve carried a diagnosis for years, it may feel woven into your identity. It may have given you community or even purpose. That’s not wrong.

But it’s worth asking:

  • Who am I beyond this label?
  • What parts of me have been overshadowed?
  • What might become possible if I stopped expecting the worst?

These aren’t questions of denial. They’re invitations to expand.

Your Body Is Not Fixed

Remember: your body is always changing.

  • Cells regenerate.
  • Nerves rewire.
  • Hormones shift.
  • Gut microbiomes restore.
  • Emotional patterns evolve.

Even if the diagnosis remains in your medical chart, it doesn’t have to define your daily reality.

Healing is the shift from:

  • Reaction → Relationship
  • Control → Curiosity
  • Fear → Possibility

That’s what it means to live beyond the label.

Three Ways to Begin

  1. Shift Your Language
    Notice when you say, “I am [condition].” Experiment with:
  • “My body is navigating…”
  • “I’m learning how to support…”
  • “My health is changing, and I’m listening.”
  1. Reclaim What Got Overshadowed
    Ask yourself:
  • What brings me joy outside of my health?
  • Who was I before this?
  • What do I still long for?
    Let healing include pleasure—not just protocols.
  1. Visualize Beyond the Diagnosis
    Spend a few minutes imagining:
  • Inflammation cooling
  • Energy flowing
  • A future you living with ease, trust, and vitality

This isn’t fantasy—it’s mental rehearsal, and neuroscience shows it changes your immune system and your brain.

A diagnosis can be a tool. It can be a map. But it is never the full story of you.

You are a dynamic, responsive, ever-changing being.

So I’ll leave you with this:
👉 Are you ready to step beyond the label? And if so—what new story might your body be waiting to tell?

✨ Ready to step beyond the label?

If you’ve been carrying a diagnosis—or a health story—that feels heavier than it needs to be, you don’t have to untangle it alone.

I created the Stories Workshop as a safe, powerful space to explore how the narratives we inherit, absorb, and repeat quietly shape our biology—and how to shift them so healing becomes possible again.

It’s 2.5 hours of guided reflection, practical tools, and community support to help you move from “this is who I am” to “this is what I’m experiencing—and it can change.”

Because your diagnosis may describe you today, but it does not define who you are becoming.

👉 [Join the next Stories Workshop here →]

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Symptoms as Signals, Not Enemies

September 22, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

Most of us are taught to treat symptoms like enemies to be silenced. What if we treated symptoms as signals instead?

Headache? Take a painkiller.
Anxiety? Suppress it.
Fatigue? Push through.
Stomach upset? Take a proton-pump inhibitor.

As we discussed in the last post, trying harder isn’t always the answer.  What we’re rarely taught is to ask a different set of questions:
Why is this happening?
What is my body trying to say?
What wisdom is here waiting to be heard?

The truth is: symptoms are not the problem. They’re the messengers.
And real healing begins when we stop fighting them and start listening.

Your Body Is Always Speaking

Symptoms are your body’s language. They’re not random or cruel. They are intelligent responses to stress, trauma, imbalance, or unmet needs.

  • That bloating? Your gut could be indicating that it needs rest, not just probiotics.
  • That racing heart before a meeting? It may be a nervous system remembering old patterns of pressure or fear.
  • That mid-afternoon crash? Maybe it’s your blood sugar—or maybe your body is asking for stillness instead of more caffeine.

When you recognize symptoms as a conversation instead of a breakdown, everything shifts. You stop battling your body and begin to partner with it.

The Cost of Suppression

Of course, wanting relief is human. Pain is real. Fatigue is exhausting. Anxiety is uncomfortable.

But if we only suppress without understanding:

  • Root causes deepen, often quietly.
  • The body’s limits get overridden, creating burnout or injury.
  • Fear grows because we believe our body is “the enemy.”

Eventually, symptoms return—often louder—because the body is still trying to be heard.

Symptoms as Teachers

Strange as it sounds, many people who heal end up grateful for their symptoms. Not because suffering is enjoyable—but because the discomfort woke them up:

  • To patterns of overwork and self-neglect.
  • To unresolved grief or hidden trauma.
  • To foods, habits, or relationships that were draining them.
  • To emotional truths the mind had buried, but the body carried.

Symptoms are like the red lights on a car dashboard. They’re not the engine problem themselves—they’re pointing you to what needs attention.

When the Body Feels Heard

Listening to symptoms doesn’t mean giving up. It means shifting from:

  • “How do I get rid of this?” → to → “What is this trying to tell me?”
  • “My body is broken.” → to → “My body is wise, and asking for support.”

When the body feels heard—without judgment or suppression—it often softens. Inflammation decreases, tension eases, and healing becomes possible.

Three Ways to Partner With Symptoms

  1. Start with Curiosity, Not Fear or Annoyance
    • Ask: What was happening right before this started?
    • Am I pushing past my limits?
    • Does this symptom remind me of an old memory or emotion?
      Patterns become clear when you track not just symptoms, but the surrounding context.
  1. See the Protective Role
    • Fatigue may protect you from burnout.
    • Pain may slow you so healing can occur.
    • Anxiety may be alerting you to unsafe dynamics.
      Seeing symptoms as protective—even inconveniently so—creates compassion instead of conflict.
  1. Let the Symptom Speak
    • Close your eyes, breathe, and ask: If this symptom had a voice, what would it say?
    • It might whisper: “You’ve been pushing too hard.”
    • Or: “You need to grieve.”
    • Or: “I need you to slow down.”
      Just listening is often enough to release tension.

You Are Not Broken

You are not broken. You are being asked to listen.

When you reframe symptoms as signals—not flaws—you move into a relationship with your body based on trust. This is the foundation of healing. The body heals best when it feels safe, seen, and heard.

Up Next: Letting Go of the Diagnosis: Healing Beyond Labels

In the next post, I’ll share how to move beyond medical labels—not by denying them, but by refusing to let them define who you are or what’s possible.

Until then, ask yourself:
What are my symptoms trying to say?
And what might change if I truly listened?

P.S. If this resonates, join the interest list for my upcoming workshop:
👉 Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis
Together we’ll explore how to decode your symptoms, rewrite your health story, and rebuild trust with your body.
Join Here

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Why Trying Harder Isn’t Always the Answer

September 15, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

We live in a culture that worships effort. We want answers.

Push through.
Try harder.
No excuses.
Mind over matter.

It values results over process, personality over character.

If you’ve been on a long healing journey, you’ve probably absorbed this mindset. It sounds something like:

  • “If I were more disciplined, I’d feel better by now.”
  • “I just need to follow the protocol perfectly.”
  • “Maybe I haven’t tried hard enough.”
  • “Maybe I should find a different doctor.”
  • “Maybe ChatGPT has the right answer.”

Here’s what I want you to hear loud and clear:

If trying harder were the answer, you’d be healed already.
You are not unwell because you’re undisciplined.
You are not stuck because you’re lazy, stupid, or haven’t found the right answer.
In fact, many people I work with are trying too hard—and it’s wearing their bodies down. They spend hours on the internet researching their conditions. Or trying all kinds of treatments that may conflict with one another. 

Sometimes, more effort isn’t healing.
Sometimes, it’s just more stress in disguise.

What comes to mind is the serenity prayer from Alcoholics Anonymous, which asks for the ability to accept what cannot be changed, the courage to change what can be, and the wisdom to know the difference. When dealing with health issues, how powerful is that!

When Effort Becomes a Trauma Response

Trying harder feels noble, but for many of us, it’s actually a nervous system habit—a survival strategy born from past trauma and/or chronic stress.

If you grew up in an unpredictable environment, you may have learned that safety came from:

  • Being the high achiever
  • Fixing everything
  • Never resting
  • Staying vigilant

In your adult life, that might translate into hyper-responsibility. You become the person who researches every symptom, manages a supplement cabinet like a pharmacy, tracks every bite of food, and schedules every minute of your healing plan.

It looks like dedication.
But underneath?
Fear. Tension. Apprehension. Exhaustion.

Your nervous system is still trying to stay safe by doing more. But that doing more comes with a cost. 

The Hidden Cost of “More”

Pushing yourself—especially when your body is already depleted—can actually move you further away from healing.

Why?

Because it keeps your sympathetic nervous system dominant—the fight/flight system.

  • Your body thinks you’re under threat, even if the “threat” is following a healing plan rigidly.
  • Cortisol stays high or dysregulated.
  • Digestion and immune function go offline.
  • Inflammation increases.
  • Restorative sleep becomes harder.

This is the classic paradox:
The more you push, the more your body resists.
The more you try to control, the more dysregulated you feel.

(I’m ignoring the freeze response for the moment.)

Doing Less Can Be Deeply Healing

This is where we flip the script:

Healing isn’t about perfection.
It’s about safety.
It’s about permission.
It’s about trust.

For many people, the real medicine is learning to let go, not pushing through.

That might look like:

  • Taking one day off your supplement schedule to rest
  • Eating a meal without over-analyzing every ingredient
  • Skipping a workout in favor of a nap (this is BIG).
  • Let yourself cry instead of muscling through
  • Trusting in something greater than you (or the wisdom of your body) to allow healing to occur

These aren’t signs of failure.
They’re signs of nervous system healing.
Of allowing your body to shift out of effort and into receptivity.

Healing doesn’t happen in effort mode.
It happens in repair mode—parasympathetic mode—where your cells regenerate, your gut restores, and your immune system recalibrates.

But what if I stop trying and get worse?

This fear is so common. It sounds like:

  • “If I let go of my routine, I’ll fall apart.”
  • “If I stop being strict, my symptoms will come back.”
  • “If I rest, I’m giving up.”
  • “I feel worse when I sleep too much.”

Let me offer another possibility:

What if your symptoms are asking you to do less?
What if your fatigue, anxiety, or pain is your body saying, “Enough. I need softness now?”

Letting go isn’t the same as giving up.
It’s giving over—to your deeper wisdom.
To the part of you that knows forcing doesn’t lead to peace.

Three Healing Shifts to Make When “Trying Harder” Isn’t Working

1. Trade Discipline for Devotion

Discipline is external. It’s about rules, expectations, control.
Devotion is internal. It’s about care, respect, and love.

Instead of: “I have to follow this protocol perfectly.”
Try: “How can I honor my body today?”

Healing becomes less about force, and more about listening. Listen to what you’re feeling.

2. Let Rest Be Productive

We often think rest is what we earn after doing enough.
But in healing, rest is the work. (And I would argue that having a regular bedtime is important too.)

Rest recalibrates your hormones.
It repairs your gut lining.
It allows your brain to detoxify.

Rest isn’t lazy. It’s biologically intelligent.

What if resting—before you crash—was the most advanced healing tool you had?

3. Soften the Inner Critic

When you live with chronic symptoms, it’s easy to feel like your body is failing you—and to internalize that failure.

An inner voice may whisper:

  • “You’re not doing enough.”
  • “Other people are healing faster.”
  • “You should have figured this out by now.”

This voice doesn’t help.
It reactivates stress, shame, and self-doubt.

The antidote?
Curiosity. Compassion. Connection.

Try saying:

  • “I’m doing my best with what I know.”
  • “It’s okay to pause.”
  • “My body is doing its best to protect me.”
  • “What am I feeling right now?”

You’re Allowed to Let It Be Easier

This doesn’t mean you stop caring.
It means you stop fighting yourself in the name of healing.

It means releasing the belief that suffering is required.
That only the hardest path is valid.
That healing has to look a certain way.

You’re allowed to feel better without earning it.
You’re allowed to rest without guilt.
You’re allowed to stop trying harder—and start healing smarter.

What If Your Healing Isn’t a Battle… But a Surrender?

Imagine your healing journey not as a mountain to climb, but as a path to soften into.
Not a battle to win, but a trust fall into your own body’s wisdom.

This doesn’t mean you never take action.
It means your actions stem from alignment—not anxiety or fear.

That’s where true healing begins.

Coming Up: “Symptoms as Signals, Not Enemies.”

In our next post, we’ll dive into the power of reframing symptoms—not as problems to fix, but as messages to understand.

Until then, I invite you to pause.
Take a breath.
Loosen your grip.
Let something be easier today.

You are healing, even now.

P.S. My upcoming workshop, “Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis,” explores exactly this shift—from force to flow, from trying to trusting.
Be the first to hear when registration opens 

 

Also to catch up on the previous articles in this story you can go here.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Responsibility Without Blame: The Key to Healing

September 8, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

It’s Not Your Fault—But It Is Your Responsibility

If you’ve struggled with chronic symptoms—anxiety, fatigue, hormone imbalance, pain, or illness—then you probably know the frustration of doing all the things: the diets, the supplements, the labs, the protocols.

And yet… you’re still not where you want to be.

That’s when the quiet, painful question sneaks in:
“What am I doing wrong?”
And just beneath it:
“Is this somehow my fault?”

Let me say this clearly: No, it’s not your fault.
But—healing is your responsibility.

And that difference may be the very thing that unlocks lasting change.

You Didn’t Choose This Starting Point

None of us chooses our starting point.

We don’t choose our genes.
We don’t choose the level of stress or trauma our nervous systems absorbed as kids.
We don’t choose the air we breathe, the food we were fed, or the emotional climate of the homes we grew up in.

Many of the patterns you’re living with now were set in motion long before you had any say:

  • Early infections or antibiotics primed your immune system.
  • A childhood of unpredictability or criticism trained your stress response.
  • Years of overwork or neglect left imprints on your gut, hormones, and sleep.

So when I say it’s not your fault, I mean it with deep compassion. These challenges are part of a much larger web—biological, emotional, cultural, even generational. You didn’t create it.

But You Are the One Who Can Change It

Here’s the paradox: while you didn’t cause it, you are the only one with the power to shift it.

This is what I mean by responsibility.

Responsibility isn’t blame. It’s not guilt. It’s not “I should have known better.”

Responsibility is ownership. It’s the moment you say:
“This is mine now. And I get to decide what happens next.”

That’s the turning point.

Why Ownership Without Blame Is So Powerful

Blame sounds like: “I’m broken. It’s my fault. I’ll never get better.”
Outsourcing sounds like: “Someone else has to fix me. I hope they figure it out.”

Responsibility sounds like: “I may not have caused this, but I can respond to it.”

That shift doesn’t just change your outlook—it changes your biology.

When you reclaim agency, your nervous system moves out of survival mode. Your immune system recalibrates. Your gut, hormones, and repair pathways respond.

This is biology listening to story.

The Trap of Learned Helplessness

One of the deepest wounds of chronic illness is learned helplessness—the sense that nothing you do makes a difference.

But helplessness isn’t just emotional—it’s physiological:

  • Cortisol dysregulates.
  • Inflammation rises.
  • Cellular repair slows.
  • The nervous system stays in overdrive.

The body prepares for danger, not healing.

That’s why one of the most important interventions isn’t another supplement or protocol—it’s restoring a sense of power. Not control. Not perfection. Just the deep knowing that what you do matters.

The Key to Healing: Three Ways to Step Into Responsibility (Without Blame)

1. Name What You Didn’t Choose—Then Name What You Can Now

Acknowledge what wasn’t yours: the childhood, the environment, the genetics.
Then ask: What is in my hands now?

  • The rhythm of your day
  • The way you breathe when you feel stressed
  • The choice to pause instead of push
  • The boundaries you set around rest and nourishment

This is your territory. This is where healing begins.

2. Choose Curiosity Over Judgment

Responsibility is not self-criticism. It’s self-inquiry.

  • Why do I crave sugar when I feel anxious?
  • What is my body asking for when a headache comes?
  • Where did I learn to ignore my needs until I crash?

Judgment shuts the door. Curiosity opens it.

3. Rewrite the Story You’ve Been Carrying

Often what keeps us stuck isn’t the symptom—it’s the story.

“I’m always the sick one.”
“I never finish things.”
“Healing is hard for people like me.”

These aren’t facts. They’re scripts. And scripts can be rewritten.

When you shift the story, your body follows.

You Are Not to Blame. You Are Not Broken. You Are Becoming.

Here’s the truth I want you to hold:

You are not at fault for what happened to you.
You are not broken because you’re still healing.
And you are not powerless to change.

The moment you take loving responsibility, you stop being a victim of your past and begin authoring your future.

That’s not just hopeful—it’s biology in action.

✨ If this resonates, you’ll love the upcoming workshop:
Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis.

Together, we’ll explore these shifts through guided reflection, nervous system practices, and group coaching—so you can finally let go of blame and step fully into your power.

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this resonates with you, I invite you to join me for my upcoming workshop:
“Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis.”

We’ll go step-by-step through the process of uncovering and gently releasing the narratives that keep us stuck—and reconnecting with the parts of ourselves we’ve pushed aside.

Because the truth is, you are more than your diagnosis.
More than your past.
And more than the story you’ve been told.

Healing begins when you believe that.

👉 [Sign up here to be the first to know when registration opens.]

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Healing Shame: How Old Wounds Can Shape Your Health

September 1, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

Healing Shame and the Stories We Carry

Stories definitely bite back at us and one of the reasons is shame. Shame is a quiet weight many of us carry without realizing it. It isn’t as obvious as anger or as urgent as fear. Instead, it lingers in the background—woven into our thoughts, choices, and even our biology. Healing shame can be a crucial component of physical health. It affects us insidiously, hijacking our nervous system and leading to many immunological and neurological issues.

And here’s what’s important to know: the shame that affects your health today didn’t start with your health. It often goes back much further—childhood criticisms, moments of humiliation, or times you felt like you didn’t belong. Recent evidence suggests that it could be a function of your ancestors.

Wherever it originated, old shame has a way of showing up in the present. And if it’s unseen, it quietly shapes your health.

How Shame Leaves Its Mark on the Body

Shame is not just an emotion—it’s a full-body state.

When shame arises, your nervous system reacts. Your shoulders hunch, your breath becomes shallow, and maybe you lower your eyes. The body literally curls in on itself, protecting you.

If that state gets repeated enough, it can become the default. Your nervous system learns: This is how we survive—guarded, tense, small.

And over time, that survival strategy changes your biology.

  • Stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline stay elevated, raising your blood sugar levels and more.
  • Your immune system drifts toward chronic inflammation.
  • Digestion slows or becomes unpredictable.
  • Your ability to rest, repair, and heal shrinks.

This isn’t “mind over matter.” It’s mind shaping matter. The stories and emotions we carry really affect the body.

The Way Shame Shapes Behavior

Beyond the biology, shame influences daily choices. Without realizing it, we often make decisions that align with our hidden self-image.

If somewhere inside you feel unworthy, you might:

  • Put off seeking medical care.
  • Downplay symptoms until they become crises.
  • Reach for foods or habits that soothe in the moment but strain your health long-term.
  • Stay in stressful situations because you don’t believe you deserve better.

This isn’t self-sabotage. It’s self-consistency. Your body and mind are simply keeping the old story alive.

This Isn’t About Blame

If you see yourself in this, please know: you did not choose this. Healing shame requires you to dig deep within your psyche. You didn’t choose the experiences that planted the shame. You didn’t choose to carry it forward. And you certainly didn’t decide to let it affect your health. Your nervous system was doing its best to protect you. What we’re doing now is simply bringing the pattern into awareness—so you can release it. Having compassion for yourself and others lubricates the process.

Meeting Shame with Curiosity

Shame thrives in the shadows. It has the most power when it remains unnamed and unspoken. Healing shame requires looking at your shadow. (I’ll have another article about the shadow later in this series.)

The moment you meet it with gentle curiosity, its grip loosens.

Here’s a simple practice you can try:

  1. Notice the moment–when you feel the urge to hide, or the inner voice says, “You’re not enough,” pause.
  2. Locate it in the body–where do you feel it? Chest, stomach, shoulders?
  3. Name it without judgment-say to yourself: “This is shame.” Not “I’m bad,” just: This is shame.
  4. Ask softly–“When have I felt this before?” Let memories surface. Sometimes they go back decades. Don’t worry if nothing comes. And you don’t have to remember incidents to heal.
  5. Thank your body–it thought it was protecting you—and in a way, it was.

This isn’t about fixing shame in one session. It’s about slowly showing your body it’s safe to stand tall, breathe deeply, and release the old armor. Daily micro breakthroughs are how we change. 

Healing Without Forcing

The body doesn’t open under pressure. It opens when it feels safe.

That’s why in the Health-Story Workshop, we don’t push or pry. Instead, we create a safe space to explore the stories you’ve been carrying. When your body relaxes, your biology changes. And when your biology changes, healing becomes more possible.

Shame may have shaped your health quietly for years. Healing shame requires meeting it with compassion to loosen its hold.

Your body remembers how to be free. And when your body feels free, health has a way of following.

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this resonates with you, I invite you to join me for my upcoming workshop:
“Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis.”

We’ll go step-by-step through the process of uncovering and gently releasing the narratives that keep us stuck—and reconnecting with the parts of ourselves we’ve pushed aside.

Because the truth is, you are more than your diagnosis.
More than your past.
And more than the story you’ve been told.

Healing begins when you believe that.

👉 [Sign up here to be the first to know when registration opens.]

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When Your Health Story Turns Against You

August 25, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

We’ve talked about how your health story is the ongoing narrative you carry — shaped by experiences, symptoms, diagnoses, and the voices of others. And in our last post, we explored how these stories can be incredibly helpful. They can guide you toward treatment, help you explain your experience to loved ones, and give meaning to what you’ve gone through.

But here’s the tricky part: the same story that once helped you can, over time, harm you.

The Shift You Don’t See Coming

It usually happens slowly.
A helpful story starts as something that explains your symptoms and gives you a sense of control. But over the months or years, it can quietly shift into something else — a limiter, a justification, or a hidden ceiling on what you believe is possible.

  • You used to say: “I can’t run because my knee injury hasn’t fully healed yet.”
  • Now it’s become: “I’m not a runner. I can’t do that. That’s not me anymore.”

The first statement leaves the door open for change. The second quietly shuts and locks it.

Why Stories Can Turn Sour

Your brain loves patterns. It wants to predict what will happen next so it can keep you safe. When you repeat a story to yourself, your mind takes it as a fact — something to plan around, not question.
This is a wonderful survival mechanism… until it isn’t. It’s like driving home from work on the same route every day for five years. You go on autopilot, creating danger if you stop paying attention.

If your story keeps you from exploring new options, trying something again, or re-imagining what healing could look like, it stops serving you and starts trapping you.

The Subtle Signs Your Health Story Has Turned on You

If you’ve been living with health challenges for a while, you might not notice when your story crosses the line from supportive to self-limiting. Here are a few subtle clues:

  • You use your health condition to explain more and more areas of your life that feel stuck.
  • You’ve stopped even considering certain activities, relationships, or goals because “that’s just not realistic for me.”
  • You feel a sense of resignation — as if this is simply “your lot” in life.
  • You notice you talk about your condition more than you talk about what you’re doing to feel better.
  • You spend more time on the internet researching your condition instead of living your life.

If you nodded along to more than one of these, it might be time for a rewrite.

How to Begin Rewriting a Limiting Story

You don’t have to bulldoze your current narrative or deny what’s true for you. This is about gently loosening the grip of a story that’s no longer helping you heal.

  1. Notice the language–listen to the way you describe yourself to others. Do your sentences end possibilities before they start?
  2. Separate fact from interpretation–“My doctor said I have X” differs from “I can never Y.”
  3. Play with “what if”–even if it feels silly, imagine how your life would look if this limitation weren’t there. What would you try? What would you reclaim?
  4. Gather counter-evidence–look for even minor examples of you doing more than your story claims is possible.

Why This Matters for Healing

When you loosen a limiting story, you open space for your brain and body to explore new patterns. You may find new energy for treatments, lifestyle changes, or therapies that once felt irrelevant. And sometimes, the simple act of re-imagining what’s possible changes your physiology — because you’re no longer bracing for a future you’ve already decided is hopeless.

Your story is powerful. If it’s helping you, keep it. If it’s hurting you, rewrite it. You are not locked inside it — you are the author.

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this resonates with you, I invite you to join me for my upcoming workshop:
“Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis.”

We’ll go step-by-step through the process of uncovering and gently releasing the narratives that keep us stuck—and reconnecting with the parts of ourselves we’ve pushed aside.

Because the truth is, you are more than your diagnosis.
More than your past.
And more than the story you’ve been told.

Healing begins when you believe that.

👉 [Sign up here to be the first to know when registration opens.]

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Mind-Body Connection Healing: When Your Story Helps You Heal

August 18, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

Last time, we explored the idea that holding onto a fixed story about your health can keep you stuck. Mind-body connection healing goes both ways. And here’s the thing—your story isn’t always the enemy. In fact, it probably got you through some very hard times.

Sometimes a story is like a walking stick when you’re climbing a steep trail: it supports you, keeps you balanced, and gives you the strength to keep going.

Maybe you’ve said things like:

“I’m a fighter. I don’t give up.”

“I’ve always been sensitive to my environment.”

“I just have to push through.”

Each of these could be part of a story that once helped you survive a health crisis, manage a chronic condition, or even protect your identity when you didn’t have answers. For a while, that story may have been a lifesaver.

A story sometimes gives us coherence and awareness. For example:

“Oh, I act that way in relationships because of how my parents treated me.”

“I reacted strongly to this situation because it reminded me of my ex.”

Here, the story gives context. We gain insight into our behavior or situation. This is powerful for many people.

Stories as Protection

When you first experience health challenges, the uncertainty can feel overwhelming. Your mind naturally reaches for meaning—something that explains what’s happening and gives you a sense of control.

In some sense, a diagnosis is a story. It paints a picture of what is happening in the body. For many, the diagnosis is a relief. Countless times, I have sat in front of patients who cry either knowing or not knowing what their diagnosis may be. And it can give you a roadmap of expectations.

A helpful story can:

Give you a framework for deciding.

Help you explain your situation to others.

Remind you that you can get through hard moments.

Offer comfort during times of fear or doubt.

When the Story Still Serves You

Is the mind-body connection healing or harming you? The test is simple: does your story expand your possibilities, or does it limit them?

If you’re finding new options for care, feeling more confident, and noticing progress—your story is probably still working for you.

For example:

“I can always improve my health.”

“My body responds well when I give it the right support.”

“I am learning what works best for me.”

These are empowering stories. They allow for growth, change, and new opportunities.

When the Story Holds You Back

But over time, even the most supportive story can become too small. Like a cast that once protected a broken bone, it can feel restrictive once healing begins.

If your story now keeps you from trying something new, exploring different approaches, or believing improvement is possible, it may be time to revise it.

That’s when the process I’ll explain in later posts will become important—learning how to recognize, question, and update your story so it works for your next chapter of healing.

Why We Start Here

Before we move into identifying and letting go of limiting stories, I want you to remember this: Your story likely helped you survive. It may have even saved you. That deserves acknowledgment—not shame or blame.

We’re not erasing your past. We’re making room for a future that’s even bigger than your current narrative.

Next time, we’ll talk about how to spot the moments when a once-helpful story has outlived its usefulness—and how to shift toward one that opens doors instead of closing them.

P.S. The Letting Go of the Story workshop will help you safely explore these questions—through guided journaling, somatic work, and small group healing. 
Join the interest list here

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The Stories We Tell Ourselves About Our Health (And How they Shape What’s Possible)

August 11, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

We all tell ourselves stories.
Some are easy to catch:
“I’m not a morning person.”
“I’ve always had a sensitive stomach.”
“I get sick every winter.”

Others operate more quietly in the background:
“I have to be productive to deserve rest.”
“My body is too broken to heal.”
“People like me don’t get better.”

We rarely see these as stories. They feel like facts. But what if they’re not? What if these inner narratives are shaping your health—your biochemistry, your immune system, even your pain—in ways you haven’t considered?

And what if the key to healing isn’t just in what you’re doing, but in what you’re believing?

Where These Stories Begin

Our health stories often start before we realize we’re telling them to ourselves. Maybe someone labeled you as “frail” or “dramatic” as a child.
Maybe a doctor told you your symptoms were “all in your head.”
Maybe you were the sibling who always got sick, or the student who couldn’t focus.
Maybe someone praised you for being “strong”—so you stopped showing pain, or acknowledged in yourself. 

Over time, we internalize those messages. They take root.
Not just in our minds—but in our tissues, our nervous system, our behavior.

These stories become our lens: how we interpret a symptom, how we respond to a setback, even how much healing we allow ourselves to expect.

What We Hide From Ourselves

Here’s something I’ve seen again and again in clinical practice:
The stories we carry about our health are often tangled up with parts of ourselves we’ve tried to hide.

We hide our fear of being seen as weak (or strong).
We hide our frustration that healing is taking so long. Or become impatient with our progress.
We hide our resentment at needing help.
We hide the parts of us that feel “too much,” “too sensitive,” or “not enough.”

This is the terrain of shadow work—making conscious what’s been buried.
When we avoid these parts, we don’t just hide them from others. We impede our healing process.

And here’s the kicker: the more we try to be perfect—flawless in our health routines, stoic in our suffering—the more energy we use up managing the image. Energy that could go toward healing.

The Hidden Cost of a Limiting Narrative

The problem with these health stories isn’t that they’re untrue.
They often come from lived experience. Trauma. Disappointment. Survival. Genetics.

But when a story gets repeated enough—“Nothing works for me,” “I’ll always be like this”—it becomes a kind of neurological script.
It shapes our thoughts. Our habits. Even our biology.

The nervous system listens. The immune system listens. The gut listens.
Every cell is paying attention to what you believe about yourself.

A belief like “I always crash after a trip” doesn’t just express caution—it can trigger the very stress response it fears.
A story like “I’m just broken” may keep you from fully committing to a new possibility.

And maybe the most dangerous belief of all:
“This is just who I am.”

It’s Not About Blame. It’s About Power.

If any of this resonates with you, please hear this clearly:

This is not your fault.

We all carry stories. Mostly, they protected us.
They helped us make sense of a world—or a body—that felt overwhelming. And if they originated in childhood, may have been a survival strategy in an unsafe place where you had no control.

But what protected you then may hold you back now.
The good news? These stories are not fixed. They’re editable. You can rewrite the script.

You can live in a new narrative—one where healing is possible, where your body is capable, and where your past does not get the last word.

Start With These Three Questions

Here are three powerful prompts to help you begin:

  1. What beliefs do I have about my body that I repeat often?
    (e.g., “I have terrible digestion,” “I’ll never sleep well,” “I’m just high-strung.”)
  2. Where did I first learn this belief?
    Was it something a doctor said? A parent implied? A role you had to play to survive?
  3. Is this story absolutely true—or just something that has been true?
    And if it’s no longer serving you…
    what might be possible if you gently let it go?

Healing Happens When We Come Home to Ourselves

Most people skip this part.
They go straight to the supplements, the diets, the protocols.

And those things matter—deeply. But they can only take you so far if, deep down, part of you believes you’re unfixable.
Or unworthy.
Or too much.
Or too broken.

Real healing starts when we stop abandoning ourselves.
When we bring light to the places we’ve pushed into the shadows.
When we release the need to be perfect—and instead become whole.

That’s what this work is about.

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this resonates with you, I invite you to join me for my upcoming workshop:
“Letting Go of the Story: Healing Beyond Diagnosis.”

We’ll go step-by-step through the process of uncovering and gently releasing the narratives that keep us stuck—and reconnecting with the parts of ourselves we’ve pushed aside.

Because the truth is, you are more than your diagnosis.
More than your past.
And more than the story you’ve been told.

Healing begins when you believe that.

👉 [Sign up here to be the first to know when registration opens.]

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Uncovering the Power of Biotherapeutic Drainage Therapy

May 12, 2025 by Dr. Gil Winkelman Leave a Comment

Biotherapeutic drainage therapy is something near to me. I first learned about it as a patient many years ago. I can’t remember why I went to see Dr. Thom originally. Maybe several things. Fatigue, sleep issues, digestive problems, migraines. I can’t remember why now. I just remember him explaining how drainage works and why taking UNDA numbers would help me. Though I experienced benefits along the way, it took several years before I felt the full effects. I remember getting out of bed one morning and realizing I got up with no pain for the first time in years.

And recently, I visited the eye doctor who asked me, “what are you doing?” I said, “what do you mean?” He marvelled how much my eyes IMPROVED; something that shouldn’t be happening at my age, he thought.

When I have patients that the Walsh Protocol doesn’t help, I like to use biotherapeutic drainage therapy. It is a holistic approach designed to enhance your body’s natural detoxification processes and promote overall wellness. It provides a myriad benefits and applications. We’ll compare this therapy with other popular wellness options and I’ll try my best to explain the process.

What is Biotherapeutic Drainage?

Definition and Overview

Biotherapeutic drainage therapy is a holistic approach designed to enhance the body’s natural detoxification processes. This therapy focuses on the removal of accumulated toxins from the body, which can arise from various sources, including air and water pollution, poor dietary choices, and chronic stress. Historically, the concept of drainage can be traced back to ancient practices in Chinese medicine, Ayurveda, and homeopathy, where the emphasis was placed on restoring the body’s balance and promoting optimal health, not eliminating symptoms.

Think of it this way. If your body was a cistern, (think of a bucket with a valve at the bottom), the valve at the bottom needs to be open to release toxins and waste. If the valve gets stuck, the top of the cistern will overflow. That’s what happens to people when they aren’t eliminating properly. Toxins build in the body and erupt through other mechanisms causing symptoms. Biotherapeutic drainage therapy aims to support and enhance these natural processes, ultimately facilitating a healthier body and mind.

Mechanisms of Action

Biotherapeutic drainage therapy stimulates the body’s natural detoxification processes through various techniques that support the lymphatic and circulatory systems. The UNDA numbered compounds work to restore the elimination pathways in the body. For example, we might give a set of numbers to help the liver clear toxins more efficiently. Working on the lymphatic system simultaneously is crucial to improvement. Things like dry skin brushing, castor oil packs, and movement help move lymph. By enhancing lymphatic flow and improving circulation, biotherapeutic drainage therapy helps to mobilize and eliminate stored toxins effectively.

Benefits of Biotherapeutic Drainage Therapy

Physical Health Benefits

One of the primary benefits of biotherapeutic drainage therapy is enhanced detoxification and elimination of toxins from the body. This process can lead to improved immune function and overall vitality, as the body is better equipped to fight off infections and diseases. Additionally, individuals may experience relief from chronic pain and inflammation, making it a valuable option for those suffering from acute and chronic conditions. In my own life, that’s what happened. The creakiness I experienced in the mornings was gone.

Mental and Emotional Wellness

Beyond physical health, biotherapeutic drainage therapy also offers significant mental and emotional wellness benefits. The detoxification process can lead to a reduction in stress and anxiety, as the body releases built-up tension and toxins. Many of my patients improve psychologically as a result of my treatments. When Walsh doesn’t work fully, I use a variety of these remedies to help improve cognitive and emotional health.

Applications of Biotherapeutic Drainage

Targeted Conditions and Uses

Biotherapeutic drainage therapy treats a variety of conditions, including allergies, digestive issues, neurological problems, and skin problems. I use it to treat autoimmune issues and other chronic illnesses. I should warn you that it doesn’t make problems leave overnight. With time, symptoms improve. And if you’ve read my blog in the past, you know that habits are such an important part of health. The processes involved in biotherapeutic drainage help build good health habits.

Integrating with Other Wellness Practices

Biotherapeutic drainage therapy can be seamlessly integrated with other holistic treatments, such as nutrition and lifestyle changes. Many of my patients will also continue a modified Walsh Protocol protocol, for example. Or they may use an elimination diet to enhance their detoxification efforts. The main thing is creating a routine that promotes overall health and wellbeing.

Comparison with Other Wellness Treatments

Biotherapeutic Drainage Therapy vs. Traditional Detox Methods

If you compare biotherapeutic drainage to traditional detox methods, you’ll find key differences in approach and philosophy. Traditional detox methods often focus on short-term cleanses or restrictive diets. Or in the case of chelation, for example, it works to quickly remove toxins from the body. The problem with this approach is what if the body isn’t ready to release the toxins? In many cases, the situation can be exacerbated.

Biotherapeutic drainage encourages a more sustainable, gentler, long-term approach to health. It becomes a lifestyle for many people even without the remedies. This helps continue detoxification after the “detox.” I mean most people shower often to get dirt and sweat off of them. Why wouldn’t you do the same with helping the body remove the interior “dirt.”

Another great advantage of biotherapeutic drainage is other treatments can continue simultaneously. I have many patients who do my treatments and either Western Medicine treatments (including chemotherapy) and/or acupuncture, neurofeedback, or other CAM type treatments. In fact, many MDs marvel about how well my patients are doing on their treatments, not understanding how biotherapeutic drainage helps reduce the side effects of those medications. Often, with detoxes, the physician does not want the patient doing other treatments as they can conflict with one another.

Conclusion

Final Thoughts on Biotherapeutic Drainage

In summary, biotherapeutic drainage  presents a multitude of benefits and applications for individuals seeking to enhance their health and well-being. From improved physical health to mental and emotional wellness, this therapy offers a holistic approach to detoxification. As you consider your individual health needs and goals, it may be worthwhile to explore biotherapeutic drainage further. If you want to find out more about biotherapeutic drainage, click on the schedule now button and send me an email. I would be delighted to guide you through the journey towards optimal wellness.

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Recent Posts

  • Who Are You Without the Struggle?
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  • Symptoms as Signals, Not Enemies
  • Why Trying Harder Isn’t Always the Answer
  • Responsibility Without Blame: The Key to Healing

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